ME
...or what I would like to say about myself, at least. :)
...which is a lot, actually.
Born in Salem OR, May 7th, 1963, at 12:03pm PST. For those of you who are interested in such things, here is my astrological chart. Currently I'm on SSI for depression, and I'm going to school to see if I can manage to get myself OFF of SSI.
I discovered tarot cards when I was 18, and I've been messing with them ever since. I've been messing with astrology since before that (Western Astrology). I'm not really as good at interpreting astrology for others as I am at satisfying my own rabid curiousity, and then teaching others how to do things for themselves. I suppose that's good, although it means I probably won't make as much money in this life as someone who prefers to do everything, and keep the secrets to themselves.
There is a definite connection between my rages and my wakefulness, and I'm learning to control both of them through nutrition and exercise, plus weekly counseling. I've found that melatonin is quite effective in lessening my rages, in combination with Vitamin B supplements, and a high-protien diet. The Sobe drinks that have come out recently are an amusingly mainstream way of taking regular doses of St. John's Wort, Ginko Biloba, and Gotu kola.
Too bad the Welfare System (if you can call it either at this point) believes in coping, and not in rehabilitation, although that's changing slowly. If they'd pay their bills in a more timely fashion, more counselors would accept medical coupons, and more people would actually be able to pay their daily bills AND get off of welfare because they'd be getting the help they most often need. At present, this problem is behind me, since the branch of Government associated with SSI is far more timely in paying their bills, and I can finally get psychological help.
I'm primarily self-taught in my present skills -- school has been just too scary and pressured for me up until lately. I have had a little college, though I need more to survive in the business world. I'm still trying to figure out how to create self-confidence.
My current skills include mudding, writing, drawing, tarot, astrology, parapsychology and magick, and philosophy. I like learning new skills. Learning is fun, as far as I can see it. I just tend to learn under specific kinds of circumstances, by doing, and at my own pace.
Speaking of learning, I found the girl I want to spend the rest of my life with! Her name is Sara, and she's beautiful! Take a look for yourself, here, at our wedding, on April 22nd, 2000.
It takes self-awareness to be free. It takes more integrity to stand up for oneself in the face of societal displeasure than it does to follow the pack. No-one ever said life was going to be simple or easy, but it doesn't have to be boring or pointless. The key to happiness is in what you believe, not in what is true or right or good. Reality is your servant, provided you can bear to see it for what it is, or what it is doing. Everyone has the same level of power, and no-one can impose their will on another without some sort of permission.
Every thought is a powerful thing if given the benefit of intention, planning, and action. The last one of the three can be the hardest, although once you get going, it gets easier and easier to put it into practice. Every habit contains a life philosophy.
I'm not perfect, and I resent anyone who makes me feel that I have to be to seek happiness, to contribute to culture and society, and to be accepted.